When Will My Baby Sleep Through the Night?
A parent checklist for independent night-time sleep
Sleeping through the night is the holy grail of early parenting. A parent needs only to do a google search for “how to get my child to…” to see how many top hits come back related to sleep. And I expect that a huge majority of us have done a similar search at some point (me included!).
However, actually getting the holy grail of “Sleeping Through the Night” in any sustainable way is a lot more of a winding path than most of us are aware of when we first become parents. And it certainly isn’t truly obtained the first time our babies sleep 5 straight hours, the length of time that researchers often define “sleeping through the night”.
Sleeping through the night is a developmental process. It is rarely a skill that we need to teach, enforce, and “make” happen. This developmental process is supported by a secure attachment and responsive parenting as well as an environment that is conducive to sleep. The emphasis here is on this being developmental, which includes neurological, sensory, and hormonal changes as well as overall maturation of the digestive system, regulation of blood glucose, heart rate, temperature, and respiration, and emotional development for managing self-soothing (an often misunderstood developmental skill that can be, but is not always, mastered as early as 6 months).
WHAT EXACTLY NEEDS TO HAPPEN FOR BABIES TO SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT?
Let me start by stating that I am exploring sleeping through the night (STTN) as a mastered milestone, rather than a temporary “one off” or as a permanent state. In the first case, infants may sleep through the night very early on (at least temporarily) and in the latter, well, we’d have to say it never permanently happens —just recall anytime you've been stressed and had trouble falling asleep!
By focusing on when mastery is likely to occur (not from practice, but because of internal and external factors that allow sleeping through the night to happen repeatedly and consistently), we can avoid tricking ourselves into thinking that a few full nights of sleep at 6 months constitutes an established skill. Revel in a few good nights of sleep? Absolutely. Bank on never needing to support them at night again? No. Kids are built to need support from us, and this support will ebb and flow through many stages of development.
As anyone who has had a sleepless night because of a late cup of coffee or a stressful situation has experienced, sleeping through the night is not a “set it and forget it” phenomenon. However, for most parents, there does come a time when they sense that their children have “mastered” independently falling asleep, and being able to re-settle again independently through the night. Independent sleep will feel like a generally stable state where only significant events (illness, a holiday, or a stressful event, for example) result in a set-back where night waking requires a parent’s assistance for falling back asleep.
So let’s take a peak then at all that needs to happen for mastering “Sleeping Through the Night”. This list is far from comprehensive. However, I hope it highlights just how much work an infant or young child is doing to move towards independence, even if it doesn’t look like it. It also provides a sense of what we do have control over in supporting our baby’s developmental progress towards independent sleep.
Sleeping independently through the night requires:
Development of predominantly night-time sleep (circadian rhythm) (generally established by 12 months) (4)
Hormone regulation (including ability to produce melatonin at close to adult levels) (6 months) (4)
Ability to fall back asleep between sleep cycles without support (self-soothing) (developing in some but not all infants by the end of the first year) (4, 5)
Digestive system development and metabolism (caloric and nutritional needs being met during the day) (9 months to 18 months for most infants)
Neurological development to reduce amount of time spent in active sleep (REM sleep) from 50% to closer to adult (20%), making night waking less likely (3-4 months) (1)
Brain maturation to allow longer sleep cycles similar to an adult’s (9 to 12 months) (3, 4)
Reduction in separation anxiety (18 months and beyond) (2)
Emotional development to be able to hold you in their mind even if you are not present (person permanence) (1 to 2 years) (2)
Sleep/wake homeostasis to reduce need for daytime naps (daytime wakefulness is sustained without a nap, leading to an increased drive to sleep by evening) (3 to 5 years old)
Emotional regulation that requires less co-regulation with a parent (2.5 to 4 years and beyond)
As you can see, there is a lot going on in the brain and body of an infant working towards independent sleep. Many of these skills rely on neurological development. All of them benefit from responsive parenting and a good sleep environment. But it still comes down to this: sleep is a developmental process that requires physiological, neurological, and hormonal processes to occur before independent sleep can occur.
As you can also see (or may have experienced with your own baby), the general belief that "babies should be sleeping through the night by 6 months" has little to do with actual child development. And we have the research on infant sleep development to back this up: see here and here for an article about sleep at 6 and 12 months, when many parents are erroneously told that sleep should be independent.
So, the next time someone asks you if your baby is “sleeping through the night” you can tell them there is a lot more that needs to happen naturally before that time comes.
In the meantime, you don’t need to do this alone. Let’s talk about what holistic sleep support with me looks like.
Warmly,
Heather
PS: This article is a continuation of my theme this month around the role that infant development plays in infant sleep. To see last week’s overview of how an understanding of development supports parents in solving sleep challenges, see here.
PPS To explore what support would look like as you navigate sleep development, book a free call with me.
References:
(1) Bathory, E., & Tomopoulos, S. (2017). Sleep Regulation, Physiology and Development, Sleep Duration and Patterns, and Sleep Hygiene in Infants, Toddlers, and Preschool-Age Children. Current Problems in Pediatric and Adolescent Health Care, 47(2), 29–42. doi:10.1016/j.cppeds.2016.12.001 Available at https://sci-hub.tw/10.1016/j.cppeds.2016.12.001
(2) Hadfield, B. (2016). Infant Sleep Educator Online Course, www.Bebomia.com
(3) National Sleep Foundation. How Your Baby’s Sleep Cycle Differs From Your Own. Available at: https://www.sleepfoundation.org/articles/how-your-babys-sleep-cycle-differs-your-own
(4) Burnham et al. (2005). Night-time sleep-wake patterns and self-soothing from birth to one year of age: a longitudinal intervention study. The Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1201415/
(5) Goodlin-Jones BL, Burnham MM, Gaylor EE, Anders TF. Night waking, sleep-wake organization, and self-soothing in the first year of life. Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics. 2001;22:226–233. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1201414/